Movie review: X-Men Apocalypse (2016)


My love for the X-Men goes way, way back. As a child, I watched the animated series. As a teenager, I watched the movies with Patrick Stewart and Ian McKellen. Now, as a 20-something, I gleefully watch the new timelines with James McAvoy and Michael Fassbender.

As such, I’m well aware that the entire franchise is, most of the time, somewhat on the crappy and cheesy side. This comes in different parts of a spectrum, with Wolverine on the worst side and Deadpool on the best side. X-Men: Apocalypse is very roughly in the middle, albeit leaning slightly towards the Wolverine side of things.

Basically, this movie was funnier than it intended to be. I definitely giggled during some of the more serious parts. The CGI was questionable at times. Some of the acting was kind of questionable at times (I’m looking at you, Jennifer Lawrence). Actually pretty much everything was questionable at times. There were some very bland parts too, and some surprises that weren’t particularly surprising. Luckily, most of this happens in the first half. And even then there were still some really  good parts there.

But oh boy, the second half. Guys I’m still excited about the second half. It was good, alright. Like, really good.  My notes literally say “SUPER EXCITING” in all capitals.

Character wise, I still don’t care (at all) about Mystique. Quicksilver, however, once again has the best scenes and steals the entire show. The drama between Charles & Erik makes me want to shake the writers and shout at them to make those boys explicitly gay already, for fucks sake, we’re already practically there anyway. Might as well make it official.

I’m also very excited about the new additions. Nightcrawler was a fun addition, and Sophie Turner did a great job as Jean Grey. I’m still a bit sad we only get to see surprisingly little of Jubilee, Storm, and Psylocke, but I have good hope that the next movie will fix that. Oscar Isaac as Apocalypse was fine, I guess, as a mostly generic Bad Guy with a shit ton of make-up that’s bound to make acting super hard. Not particularly impressive, but not particularly bad either (kind of like the movie itself).

Either way, it’s X-Men, I’ll take anything those people throw at me. Even movies that are slightly shittier than usual but still super fun.

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